Seeking Acceptance – What do you gain?

Are you one of them who want everyone around you to accept you? Are you always seeking acceptance from your new-found friends and relations? If you are, and you sometimes wonder what you lack that they haven’t yet give in, please read on!

Let me start by asking you, Why do you seek acceptance by others? Because you want them to like you and interact more with you? Fair enough! So how do you go about getting them to accept you? By trying to please them or floor them with extra love showered upon by way of frequently meeting up and gifting them something they may like? Not bad ideas, right! But still not getting quite there?

And when they finally seem to accept you, have you found those relations last for long? Do you find them worthy as much, even much later into that relation? If you have answered No here, this article is for you!

Know Yourself

The only one you need to seek acceptance from is yourself! Yes, Accept yourself, the way you are! Ok there needs to be scope for improvement always, and I totally agree! But that doesn’t mean that you should never accept yourself the way you are! Self-acceptance is understanding who you are, your strengths and weaknesses, and coming to terms with it first. It is important to understand your own strengths to hone them and your own weaknesses to overcome them. Once you master yourself, you will no more seek acceptance from others even though you will find that a lot more people tend to like you!

Strengthen the Strengths & Weaken the Weaknesses

It is important to understand that every person has some unique qualities – good or bad can differ depending upon the perspectives and situations. What may be good for you, may be bad for someone else and vice versa. What qualities do you possess uniquely is what you must ponder and focus on to enhance and leverage from it. In that pursuit, if you remain honest to yourself, you will also come across your weaknesses too. Identify them and keep them aside until you have mastered your strengths. You will find that in the process, you have overcome most of your weaknesses too. Yet, there may be some tough ones to crack for which you may have to spend some more time exclusively to weaken to the core. This process will improve your self-confidence by which you will no longer need to seek it from the others.

No Need to Change

Once you have accepted yourself, you will no longer feel the need to change yourself to be liked by someone else. Self-acceptance increases self-confidence and self-awareness. Once you are aware and confident of what you are and what you can, you will no longer feel the need to change yourself for the sake of being accepted by others. You will no longer seek others’ acceptance and hence, there’s no need to pursue any change. 

The Fear Factor

Self-acceptance helps overcome many fears, especially the fear of losing relationships. The more you are aware of yourself, the more you understand your relationships too. Good relationships will not need you to please them or make you seek their acceptance. True relations and friends will accept you just as you are. In fact, they may be happier to see you become more confident and not wanting their acceptance. You will no longer fear of losing people or situations because you now understand that material failure does not make any difference in real relationships.

Be Thankful

We tend to become more positive and value the right people when we start showing our gratitude to those who influence us positively. This increases our self-worth and makes us even more positive. We become more thankful for what we have rather than despising what we don’t have!

Positivity, Happiness & Contentment

Nobody is perfect! The moment you accept this, your fears and need to be accepted by others diminish. With self-acceptance comes happiness and contentment. When you understand yourself better and accept your strengths and weaknesses, you are coming to terms with your own self. Once you realize and accept people and situations as they are and only focus on improving them, you start thinking positively. Positive thinking brings in more happiness and contentment.

Less Pain

When you know what you are capable of, others cannot hurt you anymore! You know what you cannot do and have already come to terms with it, so even if others poke you on those issues, it won’t hurt you. There’ll be very little people can do to hurt you emotionally when you accept yourself.

You are what you are!

You have a unique combination of flaws and strengths that makes you, YOU! The moment you accept that and start working on it Positively, you will no longer seek Acceptance from others. 


I am a teacher turned software developer turned full time mom turned entrepreneur turned writer! I have enjoyed all these avtars in my life to the fullest. I am on my journey to explore a lot more about writing! Follow me to read more of what I write..

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16 comments on “Seeking Acceptance – What do you gain?
  1. savitha says:

    Nice read Geetha! I always love your writing style!


  2. […] best way to deal with life is to know yourself inside out. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Work on them and make yourself better. Once you know what you are capable of, you will have a […]


  3. Chitra K says:

    Quite insightful. Good read. Keep writing and sharing.


  4. Kalpana says:

    True, everybody needs to Introspect now and then 🙂 Interesting and Positive read, especially for self-deprecating women!


  5. navyz says:

    Wow! So well written and I can t agree more!


  6. Prasoona Reddy says:

    Very true.. in many cases biggest stress is in pleasing others.. Nice one Geetha. From JFH ambassador group connected to your writeup.. Keep going


  7. Sreeni says:

    Great Geetha…really interesting to ufollow ur philosophical thoughts..keep going


  8. Harshi says:

    This is food for thought, Geetha! I’m sure this article resonates with many of us.


  9. sangita9 says:

    Nice read!!! Good One.


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